Lost a few days going through a big scare. This blog is dedicated to finding a happy thought in each day so I will say that I’m left to be grateful that I turned out to be stronger and braver than I imagined I was.
I think a huge part of pregnancy is the sudden addition of new worries. Everything i eat, everything I do, how I take care of myself, how I rest, if I’m stressed, I imagine for the first time in my life, how these things will effect this little person who already relies on me. I second guess my own decisions more than I ever have. I feel like each one counts.
When a medical scare comes along and you’re pregnant, you can’t “knuckle through it” even if you worry you’re making something out of nothing. And when it turns out you weren’t making something out of nothing, you have to stay calm because that wee person is in there, feeling everything you feel.
I have never struggled to stay calm so hard in my life as I did yesterday at the hospital. And at the end of it, when everything was okay and I had a real answer to what I went through and acknowledged the size of it, I was grateful at what came out of me to cope with it because you never know how you’re doing when you’re going through something—only after you’re through.
Tiny Bean, I already promise to always do everything for you. You are first, for all of your life.